Uncultured

This time last week I was in the Van Gogh museum in Amsterdam. I don't think I've ever seen a real Van Gogh in 'the flesh' before, though these pictures are amongst the most famous in the world.

I walked around spellbound, mesmerized and amazed at his vibrant, bold use of colours, the complexity of the composition. . the sheer ingenuity of his wonderful mind, as landscapes were transformed into glowing, swirling collages of wild brush strokes and . .

. . ah . . .

Bollocks!

Nah, I didn't get it at all.

The pictures looked 'all wrong' and I couldn't understand what it's all about. I'd love to tell you I'm all arty and appreciate this stuff but I don't see it at all! I know it's his impression of stuff. . but they just look badly painted.

Yea, to me, they just look "all wrong" (just like those silly people thought when he painted them).And that makes me a pleb I suppose. I mean, there must be a reason why these pictures are the most famous paintings ever, and housed in a fabulous building and visited by millions from all over the world. . but they just looked 'funny' to me.

There were some other paintings there too, some Rembrandt, I liked those.

This one was my favourite, by Dijck, called 'Still Life With Cheese'. Amazing!

See, I reckon this Dijck guy could have knocked off one of those Van Gogh type pictures in half an hour, but Van Gogh couldn't have painted this if you'd have given him twenty years and a pair of best suede earmuffs for his trouble.

But I did learn something about Van Gogh. . look at these. .

See?

It's a chin thing.

I should have rubbed my chin more. . that's the key!